CALEB MICHAELS - Season 4 (by Briggon Snow)
This is a mix I made for Caleb (and really myself) coming out of “Safe House II”. It was an emotional episode to record, and as part of my process to move forward from it, I made this mix as a gift to Caleb to work through the emotional aftermath of what had happened at the end of season 3. I’d like to think that Caleb and I would listen to this together...never really talking...occasionally glancing at each other...but deeply connecting to the music and trying to get back on our feet. - Briggon Snow
1. “Waves” - Dean Lewis
More than any other song I can think of, this has always felt like an anthem for Caleb. This mix being what I’d give him to “get through” the aftermath of “Safe House II”, I see this reflecting back to Caleb what his journey with emotions has been so far, and how the difficulties and angst inherent with his ability comes and goes in waves.
2. “Human” - Civil Twilight
You’re human, Caleb. You are going to make mistakes. Some of these mistakes may be seismic in consequence and hurt...but it doesn’t make you a bad person. Love, pain, fear...and how we struggle through those feelings is what make us all human. Human beings are terrible messes...and that’s beautiful; it’s sometimes tragic...but all the while beautiful.
3. “Bitter Leaf” - LANKS
There’s an angsty resignation to this song. For me, the lyrics matter less in this...it’s more the attitude and “numbed” self-preserving defiance Caleb is feeling in between moments of self-pity and anger. At the end of the day, he’s a teenaged boy, and part of the process of accepting and moving forward stronger, especially for a teenaged boy, is a bit of “fuck-you” detachment and mindlessness.
4. “One Day” - Kodaline
Caleb can’t get through this alone. It’s tough being a young man in this world, while there’s so much good for you out there...there’s a pressure and a self-inflicted harm in the form of pride and masculine expectation. Caleb wants to figure all of this out on his own...but he knows managing his anger and recovering from his pummeling of Damien cannot be sorted out in total isolation. He needs to let in those that love him.
5. “Human” - Aquilo
To move on...to get better...you need to sit in it a bit. You have to feel the hurt and even the painful self-loathing to remotely having a chance at climbing out of the dark hole you’ve fallen into. This song is meant to remind Caleb that it’s temporary. He will stand taller, stronger and more compassionately after crying with his head buried between his legs.
6. “Fickle Game” - Amber Run
The tension and limbo of being a teenager... Not only is Caleb dealing with very real “adult” problems, but he has to deal with them at a time where he is trying to figure out his identity....he’s defiantly rushing full-sprint into manhood when boyhood challenges are still holding him with a tight grip. Growing up is full of fits and starts…Caleb is anxious to start his life and be a good “man”...but before that he needs to recognize that he is a good person.
7. “Change It All” - Harrison Storm
Caleb needs to grow from this. The struggles will never go away, but he is stronger after this. He may not feel stronger...he may actually feel weaker and pretty much lost...but that doubt, confusion and insecurity will be a defining step in how he lives a life with his ability.
8. “Something Wild” - Lindsey Stirling feat. Andrew McMahon
I mean… You've got a big heart/The way you see the world, it got you this far/You might have some bruises and a few of scars/But you know you're gonna be okay/Even though you're scared/You're stronger than you know. ...more than anything I want Caleb to know this. His future is so bright and beautiful...